Stories from sahara desert:The boy child
Today I had an interview session with a simple and intentional individual by the name Victory S. Daniel, He loves reading, traveling ,making new discoveries and research he has also published a few articles.
Victory S. Daniel who is currently a public health specialist and researcher was willing to share his thoughts The first question :why do you think the day of the boy child is not as popular as day of the girl child?
Victory : I feel the day of the boy child is not popular because we already live in a patriarchal society. And there is a movement all over the world for gender equality. So every one including I is focused on the women & girls trying to raise their voices and moving towards a balanced society. its a man's world already so no need. What men & boys go through is under rated.
My second question :what are the common problems a boy child faces in northern Nigeria particularly in Borno?
Victory :The first challenge a male child faces in the North begins from a tender age. A boy is forced to take responsibilities and grow up fast. A very common example, look at the ratio of the almajiri boys to girls, look at the ratio of boys hawking to girls in Maiduguri. In my line of duty you hear parents saying "I have all boys and I am Lucky, they will fend for themselves, no stress on me"
In one of my published write up, I talked about the unintentional mistake where parents promotes patriarchy. What they believe the boy must be strong and never show weakness or vulnerability. So a boy grows up with so much psychological and emotional stress, bottling up a lot.
Another challenge is the issue of taking up the family business or profession. I know alot of my friends that studied courses their parents chose for them so that they can continue the family line of business they sacrifice their choice, their happiness, their passion and dreams for their family, Its so painful a result of this,We have unfulfilled and unproductive men in the society. luckily my parents didn't do that to me.
I was lucky growing up, I had educated and exposed parents so it was easier for me than others.
When I was in primary School, I was in the same class with this girl Habiba Daggash (she graduated from a prestigious university in Uk with first class in her First Degree and MSc in Engineering, she is currently running her PhD, she is a brain box). Back then I always topped my class, in primary 4, I had a streak of topping my class for 3 terms.
In primary 5, I was in the same class with her and she got 1st position the first term. My mum scolded for allowing a girl beat me in class, the second term same thing, this time she told me I was a man and should never be second to a woman, I was under so much stress, the third time I was so scared to go home because I still got 2nd. Boys go through so much stress emotionally while growing up.
what do you suggest should be done differently?
It is okay for boys to cry, it is okay for boys to show weakness, it is okay for boys to share their fears, they are humans, its okay for a boy to be a class member and a girl the class captain, it doesn't make him less a man.
Boys growing should be allowed to choose their career path with guidance and not forced or coerced into choosing a career they do not want.
Boys are still children, let children be children. . .
By the end of the short interview with Mr Victory S. Daniel it was clear to me that boys who are out there on their own with no Parental care or guardian are exposed to so much which may become a problem to the society in future, in my opinion the situation is like a time bomb waiting to explode.
Read more on the unintentional mistakes parents make written by Victory S. Daniel via this link https://satisprimereporters.com/2019/11/27/opinion-the-unintentional-mistake-how-parents-unknowingly-promote-gender-inequality-by-victory-daniel-gbv-activist/
What other problem does a boy child face that is almost ignored and what should be done differently?
Please Lets hear your thoughts on this in the comment box
Thank you for reading
Wow! This is an amazing article. I've been so selfish all these while thinking only girls go through emotional stress. This is really eye opening and educating. The boy child and girl child all go through difficult stuff and at the end of the day you come to the realisation that parent and society are the cause of the problem children carry into adulthood. It isn't exactly their fault they were also raised like that. So what's to be done? The chain need to be broken. This generation of parent need to try to do it right. Fix mistakes you think your parent made with you so we can have a better and better generation in the future.
ReplyDeleteWow!! Boys are also Human being ( still being made ) Not human been . It's actually okay to be vulnerable it doesn't make him anything less . Amazing piece 👏
ReplyDeleteWow!! Boys are also Human being ( still being made) Not human been. It's actuall okay to be vulnerable and that doesn't make him anything less. Amazing piece 👏
ReplyDeleteIt's important to not leave boys behind while try trying to fight for gender equality. We should yearn for a world where every voice is heard and everyone matters.
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